Nisan: the month of renewal, the herald of spring, a time of miracles.
The name “Nisan” has its origins in an ancient word meaning bud, or beginning – parallel to “nitzan” in Hebrew. Chazal also attribute the word “nes” or miracle to the name Nisan since during this month is when great miracles occurred for the Jewish people.
When I think about the word, what also comes to mind is “nisayon” or challenge.
So how are all of these things connected? And how should we relate to this month?
We can think of it from the top down or from the bottom up. What do I mean? On top is the miraculous nature of the month. On the bottom is the challenge. If you start from the top, you take as a given that this is a month of miracles. If so, the challenge is to recognize the things that happen in our lives as miracles. If we can rise to this challenge, then new things will begin to emerge. Or we can take it from the bottom: if we start with the challenges that we are facing in life, and we make a decision to take some small steps to renew ourselves and our lives, then we may begin to see some miracles.
I think that these two approaches are not mutually exclusive. Either way, the trick is to remember that a nisayon is closely related to a nes.
Just to share a personal anecdote: Over the years of working independently, I have found that somehow my workload changes as needed. For example, every year right before Pesach – or two years ago when Ely was sick – my workload was light, allowing me to take care of the things in my life that needed my attention. And somehow, when I had more time, I had more work. I have noticed this pattern many many times, and I have been thankful for the Hashgacha Pratit that I believe is there. Well, this year, it seemed that I would be forced to work on a very important case right before Pesach. Not only would I have to spend time in preparation, but an oral hearing was scheduled in Europe on Thursday, March 25 – the day of bedikat chametz this year. I would have to attend the oral hearing by video conference, and it could last anywhere between 1-8 hours. I asked my associate in Europe if there was any way to reschedule and he said that the European Patent Office does not take rescheduling requests. The only possibilities for me not to attend were: a. if the Patent Examiner accepted our written submission ahead of the oral proceedings, which he told me was extremely unlikely; or b. if I decided not to attend and relied completely on my associate. Since this is my client and I am more familiar with the product under discussion than the associate, deciding not to attend could potentially harm the client. So I took a deep breath and started to figure out how to plan around this event.
Before I relate what happened, I want to flash back to an anecdote from my book. Here is an excerpt:
Just this morning, I had a moment of appreciation for the hashgachah that is always with me surrounding my work. I have been working as an independent patent agent, with my own clients, for fourteen years now. And it never fails. When I have more time, I have more work, and when I have less time, the workload somehow decreases. And somehow, even though my workflow is somewhat sporadic, it provides us with just enough income to keep us afloat. This does not just “happen.” I have been aware of this pattern for a very long time, but the knowledge of this phenomenon has been something intellectual. The emotion that should go along with the awareness of this incredible, phenomenal “phenomenon” has been lacking. Today, sitting in the hospital, I received an email that allowed me to relax about a particular case that I thought would be a headache. At that moment, I started to appreciate this hashgachah at a different level. And as I am sitting here writing these words, tears are coming to my eyes. Because this is one more sign that we are being enveloped by Hashem’s love. Through it all. Right in the heart of this difficult treatment, He is sending us signs that He is there with us.
Well, just as I thought that this year would be different, it seems that a Nisan miracle has happened. I received an email from my associate in Europe informing me that with some minor tweaks, the Examiner is ready to accept our changes and allow the patent, which means that the oral proceedings will be canceled.
This, to me, is a reminder of the love that Hashem continues to shower upon me. True, it’s been a very tough couple of years. And true, it is hard for me to appreciate all of the good things in my life and to feel Hashem’s presence most of the time. But somehow, this seemingly small chesed has managed to touch me in a way that all of the big miracles did not. I am feeling emotional; I am feeling embraced; and I am feeling that I want to share these sentiments with others as a way of thanking G-d.
Thinking again of the words: ניסן ניסיון – both of these words have”נס” in them, but with a long “nun” at the end, almost like a crutch. Sometimes, when that crutch is removed, and the “נס” has to balance on its own without the extra leg, that is when instead of a physical “crutch” we get something much better; we are held up instead by Hashem’s embrace.
And so, during this month of Nisan, which is indeed a month of big miracles, sometimes it is the small challenges and the small miracles that really make a difference. Here’s hoping and praying for a year of renewal, a year of successfully facing our challenges, and a year in which we continue to feel and recognize Hashem’s presence and love.